Articles 20VN | It's All Relative | grandparents | family history | living ...

There is an old Chinese proverb that says - The house
with any old grandparent harbors a jewel.

In today's society, with the hectic lifestyles and myriad
activities from children going to daycare to parents
having late night meetings, sometimes "seeing" life
seems to become a blur. The school-age children
have soccer practice, band rehearsal, and scouting.
Life is one activity after another and the clock stops for
no one.

The beauty of having the gift of either having a grandparent
live in your home or near you cannot be duplicated or
replaced. Surely, caregivers work hard and deserve thanks
and respect. But grandparents give you the opportunity of
actually seeing and touching the past in your family history,
the current (you) and the future (your children). It is all the
generations under one roof and it is a nod from the heavens
above. The little ones gain the most by being given the chance
to hear what their parents were like at their age, and then to see
the difference in what life was then and now. We all have heard
how many miles a grandparent walked to school in the falling
and freezing snow and rain, but that is what makes life special.
It is the light at the end of the tunnel of a bad day, and it is the
extra special holidays when old and young mix and match and
bring all the flavors together into one great feast.

Visiting the elderly in nursing homes is a bit different. There you
are presented with seeing those who have no one who can take
a minute to visit and those who are not even able to recognize
their loved ones. This experience can be heart-wrenching but it
can also give life a different perspective. Life will go one even if
we don't actively participate, or have a say in what goes around.
But if you are given the chance or the open invitation to make
life for a grandparent a bit more respectful or wonderful than
nursing staff and watching TV, do it - without a second thought
reach out and what you reap will add treasures to you and to
your family that cannot be equaled anywhere on this planet we
call earth.

Even Louisa May Alcott wrote - A house needs a grandma in it.
The house definitely needs our grandparents but then so do we.
Our hearts are big enough to hold everyone and what you give
to your children through the experience of knowing and loving
grandma and grandpa won't be found anywhere else. Your home
will be just a bit brighter and while it may not be smooth sailing
every minute of every day, the challenge and the openness of
dealing with what will come to all of us some day is a gift in itself.

Pictures of grandparents and even great aunts and uncles is fine
and sometimes life deals us the cards of not being able to truly
know them in person, but talking to your children about your
relatives, including them in events and celebrations, and spending
an afternoon reminiscing about their past and yours is stellar.
It is hearing history in person, touching the hand that made life
bearable to others, and looking into the eyes of an individual who
saw so much, may not remember, but stored it in their hearts and
souls. It is seeing life in a whole different light and feeling the
warmth and strength in that life. It is being blessed.
Something to think about.

?Arleen M. Kaptur

August, 2007

Source: http://www.20vn.com/home-family/it-s-all-relative-765.htm

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